Is Instagram the narcissist?

and other thoughts from a week off the 'gram

On a whim, though not without thought, I decided to join a few other folks in abstaining from social media for the month of January. The timing was good after a month of scrolling while snuggling sick kids. When the jingles from reels start playing unbidden in my head I know I’ve crossed an unhealthy line.

It’s been a while since I’ve taken an extended period of time off, and it’s a little embarrassing how twitchy I’ve felt this last week - how many times my thumb reached to open the app, only to remember I had deleted it, or how many times I picked up my phone only to put it down again because it was sort of boring. Twitchiness aside, the thing I found most curious as I observed my reactions was this pervasive feeling that I was in danger of being erased. If I wasn’t on social media, how would people know I exist?

It sounds ridiculous. Why would I need social media to validate my existence? But the feeling that I might be forgotten altogether if I didn’t assert my existence, persiste…